Farewell Forever
by Drosselmeyer's Ancestor
Summary: This is the way I'd like the fight between Shizuo and Izaya to go. Sort of book 12 spoilers, though I've only read small summaries so not really. Contains some nasty choking.


_"Abayo."_  
_-Shizuo Heiwajima_

Goodbye.  
Goodbye.  
Goodbye.  
Goodbye.

The word had a nice sound to it, Izaya thought. It was a word that fit its meaning perfectly, swallowing the last syllable like a black hole, a finality that slammed the meaning down. Good-bye.

Well, considering who was coming for him, it may not be a 'good' bye, per say. Izaya stares down at his phone for a moment, contemplating. He probably shouldn't have taunted Shizuo, not at this moment. But he was so close...And Shizuo so dangerous...It's for the sake of keeping the plan safe. For that reason only did he call out to Shizuo.

He feels a familiar bubble of hatred rise up in him as he hears soft steps get closer and closer. It's then that he turns and looks, with a smirk on his face, at Shizuo.

"Ah, you're very timely today, Shizu-chan."

Shizuo says nothing, which, while startling in a way, isn't too surprising. He had been very quiet over the phone after all. Izaya begins to speak again.

"What's the matter, Shizu-chan? What was with that finale like goodbye? Certainly you can't be thinking of killing me-"

Something flies past his vision at breakneck speed, and Izaya relaxes - he wasn't tense in the first place or anything, not really - and moves cautiously. "Ahhh, that's more like you."

Shizuo is still silent. It feels...Creepy. _Very much like he's finally embraced the fact he's a monster,_ Izaya thinks, but the thought isn't as reassuring as he'd like it to be. Not that he needs reassuring.

"Hmmm? Shizu-chan," Shizuo moves, very slightly, and Izaya moves, the same amount, "It's no fun for me if you just stay silent!"

There's not a sound.

Izaya isn't sure what's coming, but he can feel it, the radiation of anger, the pure loath that comes from Shizuo, and Izaya thinks of his plan and thinks that he needs to survive long enough for that to work, and a thought barely crosses his mind that he may not actually live that long. But it's a short moment. This is Shizuo. Shizu-chan, so unpredictable and easy to hate and yet there are things that even Izaya can understand-

-Shit, he almost got hit that time. He jumps aside as Shizuo's fist cracks through the air, twirls on the heel and pulls out a knife.

"Missed me, ahaha."

This silence is all wrong, Izaya thinks, and it irritates him, the way Shizuo is behaving as usual, being unpredictable and difficult. Why couldn't he just work into the plan like everyone else? The fact that Izaya had to factor him into his plans was frustrating enough, but to have to deal with his interference directly was another matter entirely. He was so close, and then Shizuo just had to be like this, utterly impossible to understand-

-He dances past a flying piece of rubble, jumps across roofs and then the chase is on, Shizuo pursuing him without noise, like he's carried by shadow.

Two can play that kind of game though, and Izaya moves just as silently, shoes light on the cold rooftops, tap-tap-tap-tap across concrete roofs. He thinks about where he should be, directs himself there. It would be great, he thinks with a little smirk, if Shizu-chan could see him gain immortality as he's trying to kill him- Ah, another flying object he needs to dodge, he twists and then

* * *

He grabs him by the hood, yanking him with a force that would break anyone else's neck, but Shizuo knows that won't happen to Izaya because Izaya can take flying through the air, Izaya has withstood vending machines and mailboxes, and he's damn well sure Izaya can handle being yanked by the hood and slammed onto the ground.

And Izaya does, Izaya hardly even shows any sign he's feeling pain when he's slammed onto the roof of a building someplace, Shizuo pinning him down, straddling him. Shizuo doesn't know where the flea was planning on leading him, but he knows that it's not gonna happen. Tonight Izaya Orihara doesn't move again.

That's his plan, but Izaya looks up at him as if he's bored, and the hate rises, turns furious-but then ices up, slowly, creeping along his spine. Cold fury, something so icy and harsh that he hates Izaya more for making him feel it. He doesn't want to speak to him, he doesn't want to deal with him, he wants him out of his life and out of his friends' lives and he slams his fist into the concrete, a large crack next to Izaya's head. He hates this feeing. He hates Izaya, the fucking insane informant who's been driving him in circles for years-

"Ah, Shizu-chan, the people working won't like that." Izaya says. His knife hand, one of them at least, moves up like lighting, but Shizuo catches his wrist as the knife digs into his face. He hardly feels it. There's a wet feeling on his cheek, a drop of blood lands on Izaya's coat.

The man has the nerve to look offended at it, going, "Shizu-chan! You've ruined my coat!"

Shizuo resists the urge to tell him to shut up, smashing his arm into the concrete instead. Izaya does wince a little, soundless, but the grimace is enough. His other arm goes up. Shizuo grabs his wrist-that knife was dangerously close to his eye-, and slams it down as well, and Izaya is pinned down like a crucifix, almost, except the metaphor is off - the devil on the crucifix? Shizuo growls.

Izaya looks up at him. There's something there that isn't quite there, a missing part of an emotion, something. Shizuo can't place it. He hardly understands what's running through his head right now, all he feels is cold, a chill that goes into his bones and waits there.

"So, what next, Shizu-chan? Going to leave me like this the whole night? Gonna try to fix what I've already done?" There's a mocking laugh. "I've already won, Shizu-"

That cold fury rises up, crashes down, and Shizuo finds himself speaking without meaning to.

"You've won? What the hell is that?" His voice is low, raw. "You haven't won shit, flea. You've just fucked with everything."

Izaya watches him. He watches him, and in his eyes Shizuo can feel it, the hate and the burning urge to stab him using nothing but willpower alone, and his hands are around his throat and he's choking the man-

-who's laughing and laughing-

-he's crushing his windpipe and he's still just-

-laughing and laughing and turning blue and-

-he's fucking crushing his windpipe, how can he even get any air to laugh-

-he's gasping and laughing and blue and his arms are flailing and clawing at Shizuo's hands and Shizuo thinks he sees fear for the first time in those wild red eyes and thinks that-

_-this is so wrong, this is so wrong he's a human being-_

_-this is Izaya-_

_-this fucker ruined so much-_

-there's fear in those eyes and he's losing consciousness, wide eyed, crimson, he's not laughing anymore-

_-this is a human being-_

_-You are not a monster._

* * *

Izaya tries to get a stab in and succeeds, but blood drips onto his coat and he frowns. Disgusting red blood from a disgusting thing.

Truth be told, he's not in the best position right now. His body aches, he feels the weight of Shizuo on him like a bag of bricks, and he can't move, curses his skinny figure. Shizuo is glaring down at him with something unnaturally cold for someone like him, something, Izaya corrects himself as he raises his other arm, he can't afford to play around anymore, but of course Shizuo has to stop him from stabbing his eye out, and of course he has to slam his arm down. Never gentle, this monster. Izaya stares at him with nothing in his mind other than_ the plan the plan the plan_, he repeats theories and memories over and over in his head, blocks out any fear because-because he simply doesn't have any. Honestly! Shizuo doesn't kill people. Shizuo will certainly bring people to near death, but he doesn't directly kill people. It's part of his enigmatic ways, Izaya stares up at him, mocks him, hears his own voice, "So, what next, Shizu-chan? Going to leave me like this the whole night? Gonna try to fix what I've already done?" And he laughs, but he can feel it, somewhere deep that he's rambling, "I've already won, Shizu-", and then he's cut off by words that are much too cold, but with the same honesty and there's this- this rising disgust, Izaya looks at Shizuo and thinks _I should have stabbed your eye out years ago, then you wouldn't be this troublesome, then I'd be better-_

Sudden pressure on his throat, a sudden cutoff of air, only a thin, thin stream makes it down and up his pipes and it's not enough and he looks at Shizuo and can only laugh because he doesn't know. He doesn't know if Shizuo will kill him. Even in this position he doesn't know if Shizuo will kill him, can't tell, looks and while he's still conscious sees the anger and the rage and he realizes he may actually die when he's this close and-

_ -Air-_

-he can't believe he let this happen to him, the plan the plan_ the plan_-

_-Air-_

-this is unbelievable, Shizuo is crushing him and he laughs and laughs and he's straining and feeling his own humanity rise up and out of him like it shouldn't-

_-Air-_

-Shizuo's not playing around Shizuo will kill him Shizuo is killing him _Shizuo why Shizuo I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you I can't breathe I need to breathe I need-_

_-Air-_

_-I need I need I need I need I need I need to breathe I'll kill you Shizuo Shizu-chan I need to live I hate you Don't Kill Me Please Don't Kill Me I need-_

_-Air-_

_-Don't Kill Me Don't Kill Me Don't Kill Me I need I -fear- I need to breathe-_

_-Air air air air I NEED TO **BREATHE**-_

His hands claw at the constriction but he knows in the back of his mind that he can't do anything. He has no air supply, he's losing his sight, he's losing his motor function, he stares helplessly up at Shizuo and he would think, _you lucky bastard, you got me_, except he can't think, he's blacking out, and his last moment of sight is one that he wouldn't believe, Shizuo Heiwajima is looking down at him with pity, with compassion, and it's wrong, all so wrong wrong wrong wrong, Shizu-chan isn't supposed to see him as human-

Izaya Orihara loses consciousness just as he breathes another breath.

* * *

Shizuo stares down. He looks over every feature of Izaya carefully, pale skin, black hair, bruised neck, closed eyes, terrified to calm, nearly unnoticeable breaths. Thin. Breakable.

Shizuo looks at his own hands, calloused and dirty, light scratches from Izaya's nails already fading away. He looks at the bruises on Izaya's neck. He's tired. There's no ice in his veins anymore. There's not even a hot fury or a warm rage, just a tiredness that drains him limp. He sits next to an unconscious Izaya -tolerable at best in this state- and stares at the city for a while, thinking about nothing at all. He listens to uneven breathing and thinks that when Izaya wakes up he'll be feeling it for weeks. Serves him right.

When he fairly certain Izaya won't die, Shizuo gets up. There are still things he needs to do, and if he spends anymore time with Izaya, he's going to snap again.

He stretches, head moving from right to left, and moves.

* * *

Izaya wakes up disoriented. He can hardly remember anything, except the plan and Shizuo and air, he touches his throat when he takes an aching breath. Swollen. It hurts, and he rises slowly, his whole body aching. He has a headache. His arms are sore, as well as his legs, and it looks like it's near morning, with the sun peaking-

"...Ugh."

He frowns as flashes come around, Shizuo chasing him, being flung down, panic. Izaya grits his teeth at the last second memory, Shizuo -that protozoan brute- looking at him with pity. Him of all people.

"Disgusting." He mutters, rather sullenly.

* * *

ahhhhhh so I read some book 12 spoilers/summaries and I have to say I hope neither Shizuo nor Izaya die UU; Them fighting is bound to be messy though...

'Abayo' supposedly is culturally significant in Japan as 'goodbye' but with forever type of meaning, like 'goodbye forever.' Apparently Shizuo uses it while speaking to Izaya in book 12, which...Does not bode well.


End file.
